Memoir Writing 101: Voice

I am going to stress to you just how important it is to write in your own voice.  Do not invent a character to be the author of your story.  You are you.  So you have to write as you.  When I'm telling funny stories to my family and friends, I use the same tone, words, and profanity as I do when I write.  Now, when I'm writing a how-to or something inspirational? (like my informational posts on Girl Lost) I use my professional voice.  But when I write about my life, I use my voice.  No, I do not talk like that every single day.  But I do in moments everyday.  And usually when I'm trying to be funny.  When you write about you, use the voice you'd use when you'd tell the same stories to another person.  Because there is only one you.  And your voice?  Is part of your memoir.  It's part of your story.  It's who you are coming out on paper (or a screen, but same diff).  

You don't have to write in the voice you use every day, or you can.  But you should use a voice that represents your subject and theme.  My serious memoir, I do not swear in it.  It would be highly uncomfortable to write about something that's not funny and use a funny voice.  So choose your voice according to your subject and theme: your funny voice, your serious voice, your vulnerable voice, your nostalgic voice, your powerful voice, your inspirational voice, etc.   

Also, consider writing more than one book in the same voice.  That way those that read one of your books will assume that they will like most, if not all your books and will read them.  I make sure to write in my book descriptions what kind of voice I'm using.  If I'm writing in my funny/sweary voice, I mention that.  If I change up my voice for another book, I write that.  I don't want to disappoint my readers or trick them into buying my books.  Have you ever read a bunch of books by the same author, only to find that some of their books are a different genre or have something so different in them from the others that it just messes with your head and makes you hate it?  Yeah, don't do that to your readers.  Be honest with them.  I mean, these are memoirs, not works of fiction, so honesty is a given (or should be, I'm looking at you, you-know-who, the man who writes tons of memoirs, most of which are fiction, shame on you!).  

Your voice dictates your fanbase.  The only old people who would like my books are old people who awesome and swear a lot.  My fanbase as a whole are probably mostly women (and some cool dudes) who have dealt with drama from their families, who are full of NPD and who have a little bit of a more open personality, like me.  I'm not prim and proper, so those that are, probably will not enjoy my books.  If I wanted to reach those people, I should have picked a different voice to write in.  This is why voice matters.  Who do you want to reach?  People who are like you?  Or people who aren't?  It doesn't matter if some people don't like you and what you say.  What matters is that your writing is a reflection of you and who you are.  Your true fans, those that really understand what you're writing about and can connect to it, will find you and read what you have to say.  You just have to make sure to use the right voice. 

For years, I tried to write my first memoir.  I started and stopped at least twenty times.  And every single one was about my father.  Turns out, writing about him was hard, because I just couldn't connect to him or his story. But mostly, I was using the wrong voice (well, actually, I had the wrong subject and theme, which led to me using the wrong voice).  When I started writing my actual first one, I blew through that thing in less than a month.  I had enough to publish by then, but after, I kept finding more and more stories to add to it.  It was flowing through me like verbal diarrhea.  I couldn't stop writing!  Finally, I had found my voice AND the right subject and theme.  It became easy to just let the stories flow onto the paper from my mind.  I ended up with too many stories and had to cut some (which I'll share on this site).  That's never happened before, not even in my fiction writing!  

Finding the right voice for your story is pertinent.  And here's the best way to help you find it, are you ready??

Here it is:

Ask yourself, if this was made into a TV show (like "Everybody Hates Chris" or "Fresh Off the Boat"), how would you want it to be shown?  Do you want it to be funny like those two shows?  Or do you want it to be a serious miniseries or maybe a drama movie?  It's not about if these things would actually happen, it's imagining if they did, how do you want your life seen?  I always write my fiction as if it were a movie.  I imagine it playing out in my head as I write it (I am a very visual person...for example, if I'm trying to remember the way a word is spelled, I have to imagine it as a picture in order to visually "see" it for me to remember).  But when I write my memoirs, I write as though it were one day going to be made into a hilarious TV show (though sometimes I also think it would make a great 1970's country and western drama, like "Rhinestone Cowboy").  Imagine your life story on the screen and write it the way you want it to be seen by others.

It helps to "see" your life visually, as someone outside of yourself, in order to know if the way you're writing is working or not.  This way you can find the right voice to use (an again, I stress this greatly, use your voice, not a character you made up to tell your story--though we all have many voices in our daily lives: our mom/dad voice, our "comfortable" voice--the we use with those we feel the most comfortable with, our phone voice for paying bills or doctor's appointments, our work voice, our funny voice, our serious voice, our "teaching" voice, etc.--they are all us, so pick which one you want to use).  

Just like Maya Angelou said: "Words mean more than what is set down on paper. It takes the human voice to infuse them with deeper meaning".  You have to create the meaning in your words.  You have to let the readers see through your eyes.  And your voice is how you do that.  

Any questions or suggestions?  Drop them below :)